Tag Archives: trials

I Was a Patient In a Hospital

Literature, , ,
Some Thoughts On Dealing With Physical Infirmities

by David E. Moss

Many of you reading this have had similar experiences to mine. Some were much more severe, some less. My story is not unique, but I hope in telling it that all our stories will be told; and in the telling, I hope that words of comfort and encouragement may be conveyed to those who presently suffer infirmity and to those who face it in the future.

Infirmity

I had been hospitalized three times in my life, all for kidney stones. So, when pain flared up on the left side of my back, I knew exactly what was happening. It was Friday February 23 and I was supposed to speak at a Sweetheart banquet that evening. Tylenol helped a little, but the pain was distracting even after several doses. Somehow, I managed to get through the banquet and return to my bed where I agonized all night.

On Saturday, the pain diminished somewhat and on Sunday God graciously relieved me from all pain. I began to think that it was just going to pass away, but Monday proved otherwise. The pain returned in earnest and would not subside for days. Our Doctor approved some strong pain medication I could take at home, where I hoped I could pass the torturing stone.

By Thursday, nothing had changed and I was running low on medication; so we called the Doctor to see what he would recommend. After a visit to his office, he suggested I go to the hospital where they could do something more direct about my condition. At 4:00 that afternoon I was admitted into the York hospital, hooked up to an IV and relieved of some of the pain by hypodermic needles.

Friday, tests were conducted to determine the location of the stone. It was not until mid afternoon that these were complete. They showed a blockage but it was unclear if this was the location of the stone. I spent the weekend hoping that it would pass on its own, but it did not. Monday, more x-rays were taken and I was put on the schedule for the operating room the next day.

On Tuesday afternoon, my doctor performed a procedure to retrieve the stone. When he reached the place of the blockage, there was no stone. It was apparently still lodged in the kidney. He continued probing all the way into the kidney itself, working inside of me for an hour and forty minutes, but could not reach the stone. When I awoke in the recovery room I was adorned with a catheter and was in excruciating pain.

For three and a half days I bled and suffered several kinds of pain in addition to the kidney pain which continued off and on. By Saturday all of this began to clear up and the catheter was removed. It turned out to be a good day and I hoped to go home on Sunday.

When I awoke early Sunday Morning, I still felt very good. But between 8:00 and 9:00, a fever came over me and I became delirious. The hospital staff began to scamper about, restarting my IV, taking tests and rushing me down for an ultrasound. I had developed a urinary tract infection and was very, very sick. Instead of going home, I lost the whole day, sleeping in the hospital, basically unaware of anything.

Monday I was better, but still battled a low grade fever. The Doctor told me I had to be fever free for several days before I could go home. On Thursday morning at 10:00 a.m., I was released and arrived home, fourteen days from the time I entered and twenty days since the pain had begun, with a stone still embedded inside my kidney.

For twelve days I enjoyed the comforts of home, except that on the tenth day I began to experience fever and chills. Over the next two days this condition worsened, indicating that infection had returned to my urinary tract. The stone had finally moved out of the kidney but now had created a blockage.

Tuesday March 26 I was back in the hospital. A tube was inserted through my back into my kidney in order to bypass the urinary tract and relieve the infection. It worked.

Three days later, I was in the operating room again. This time the doctor located the stone but it was too large to pull out. So, he used an electronic device and blasted the stone into a thousand tiny fragments. Finally, I could begin the upward journey of healing and recovery.

I went home from the hospital 38 days after I had felt the first pain. There were still follow-up visits, tubes to be removed, strength to be recovered and healing to occur. But finally it was over and I could reflect upon the value of the experience.

Comfort

Literally thousands of times, I have stood beside hospital beds as a Pastor and offered words I hoped would soothe the discomfort of the sick. Now I lay for endless hours, suffering diverse kinds of pain, sometimes numbed with medication, but always with time to think.

There are two favorite thoughts that have thrilled my heart during many days of good health. I believed them with fervor, even though I had not had opportunity to apply them in really serious situations. Now, they became the very things which sustained me in times of suffering.

  1. God knows what is best for me

    Would a human being ever choose to suffer? Not one in his right mind. The Bible says, No man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it… (Ephesians 5:29). It is normal for a person to encourage the health of his own body and to seek a prosperous physical experience.

    Why, then, would God allow suffering to occur, especially to those who love Him and are called according to His purpose? Some believe God repudiates physical infirmity and wants every one to be healed of all his diseases and deformities. Yet life demonstrates otherwise. He allows suffering, sometimes to great extremes and sometimes to those who live in closest fellowship with Him.

    Faith involves believing that God is always right. Applying this to our times of suffering is crucial. God is indeed capable of preventing or stopping every infirmity we experience. If he does not, it is because He has chosen not to stop it. And, if God chooses not to stop our suffering, He has good reasons which we should accept rather than question.

    Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego, servants of the most high God, had an exemplary attitude considering matters like this. They said, If it be so, our God whom we serve is able to deliver us from the burning fiery furnace, and he will deliver us out of thine hand, O king. But if not, be it known unto thee O King, that we will not serve thy gods, nor worship the golden image which thou hast set up (Daniel 3:17-18). In other words, God is able to stop whatever infirmity that strikes a human being. I believe that with all my heart and hope in His deliverance. But if God chooses not to deliver me, it will have no effect upon my faith. If God wants me to suffer, He knows better than I do what is best for me.

    There is a little game I have played for many years. I look for faces in places like wall paper patterns or grains in wood surfaces. It is amazing what a little imagination can do in amusing oneself. The door to my hospital room was a wooden door and when swung open was directly in front of me. So I played my game and found two faces. One was sinister looking, like a villain who lurked in the shadows of evil. The other was a face of strength, with lines of firmness, portraying the courage of a protector standing guard. Just below this second face was a plaque which read in part, “In memory of I. B. Abel”. This was not a vision. God was not speaking to me outside of His word. But sometimes God does use simple things in life to remind us of truth we have previously learned from Scripture. The two faces and the plaque reminded me of God’s ability and readiness to take care of me in the midst of suffering. Regardless of what sinister thing may threaten my life, He has posted His angels on guard as ministering spirits to the saints (Hebrews 1:14). Beyond that, He Himself is able to do exceeding abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that worketh in us (Ephesians 3:20). It was His way of saying, Remember, I am able. The reminder brought tears to my eyes.

    So I thanked God that He knew best, and waited upon Him for whatever He would do, or for whatever He would choose not to do.

  2. God is consciously thinking about my trouble

    One day, a verse of Scripture jumped off the page and struck me in my heart. It was Psalm 31:7, I will be glad and rejoice in thy mercy: for thou has considered my trouble; thou hast known my soul in adversities.

    James tells us to consider it a joyful experience when we are confronted with diverse temptations. But, we may wonder how this is possible, because trouble and joy just do not seem compatible. Psalm 31:7 explains it. It is possible to rejoice in the midst of trouble when we realize that God is actually thinking about our specific trouble and that He is personally interacting with our soul while we are suffering.

    What more could one ask for, than to have the God who sits upon the throne of Sovereignty personally considering the specific circumstances of our little lives. Just knowing that He is thinking about us is a tremendous encouragement to our heart (for who are we to deserve the attention of the Almighty?). But there is more. Not only does He think about our trouble, God also personally interacts with our inner man, sustaining hope, while our outer man suffers adversity. Of all the things He has to do, He takes the time to breathe into our soul reminders of the wonderful truths we have learned from His Word. And with those whispers of His Spirit, the physical pain is reduced by the peace that swells in our heart.

    Knowing that God was personally involved in the whole affair, I was able to lie in the hospital bed with full assurance that I was in the palm of God’s hand.

Care

There was another dimension of this hospital experience that made a profound impression upon my life. It was something that I missed in my previous experiences with hospitals. It involved the nurses.

The nurses in the York Hospital, floor six main, could not possibly have given me and my roommates better care. I saw in those nurses what compassion and sacrifice and ministry are really all about. There were some very messy things they had to clean up, some frustrating circumstances they had to deal with, some crises they had to react to, and they did it all with patience, with cheerfulness and without complaint. They were remarkable in the way they cared for each of their patients.

This spoke to me of the way Christians ought to care for one another within the body of Christ. Every time a need arose, those nurses were right there tending to it. Sometimes they had to be firm, sometimes gentle. Sometimes they had to act quickly, and sometimes show great patience. Sometimes they had to clean up really dirty stuff, and sometimes they had to work really long hours. But they did it all with smiles on their faces and with genuine concern in their hearts. It was obvious they were employed as nurses because they really cared about people and were willing to do whatever was necessary to provide all of the care each one needed.

It made me think of the passage in I Corinthians 12 where the feeble members of the body are given honour and where all the members of the body should have the same “care” for every other member of the body. In fact, for the feeble ones, more honour and more care is in order, because they need the assistance of the strong ones.

Wouldn’t it be marvelous if a group of people who belong to a local church could serve each other as these nurses did their patients in the hospital? Imagine believers who are ready at any moment to meet a need as soon as they become aware of it; who are ready to get their hands dirty cleaning up every mess they find; who are quick in a crisis, calm in the midst of frustration, gentle with the suffering, firm with the irresponsible. But always there, always serving, always giving that extra effort, meeting the need, warning the unruly, comforting the feebleminded, supporting the weak (I Thessalonians 5:14).

There was, in addition, the care of the saints, who I knew were standing with me in this time of need. The sense of many prayers being offered on my behalf was very real. Card upon card brought thoughts of encouragement, and visits from close associates and family sustained my hope.

I know I am blessed as a Pastor, to have so many care about what happens to me. But it makes me aware that less visible people need the same care when they experience similar infirmities.

Conclusion

Suffering is not fun but it does not have to be a disaster. Divine comfort and human care make it possible to endure.

If you are presently experiencing physical infirmity, I understand. I know what it is like to have pain, to writhe in agony, to crave sleep for a temporary respite, to wish it would just all go away when it refuses to do so. But I also understand what it means to be soothed by those who truly care. There is great relief when God ministers to the inner man and human beings care for the body. There is great relief when you know so many are praying for you and so many are hoping with you for deliverance from your infirmity. There is great relief in looking beyond the immediate circumstances and realizing there is something much greater at stake than your own comfort.

Physical infirmity is an opportunity to demonstrate the reality of one’s faith. Do I really believe God knows best? Am I willing to wait for Him to bring resolution? Can I show observers what God is like by how I react to prolonged suffering? Will I leap through the open doors to testify of God’s mercy through Christ?

Say yes. Welcome physical infirmity into your life when it comes. Rejoice in the day of trouble. Glory in your infirmities. Be grateful for the opportunities they provide to give life to your faith by the works of faithfulness. I know it can be done. I’ve been there.

The One who made us knows how to mend us. He is the Great Physician – the only One who can heal body, soul, and spirit. His appointment calendar is never too full… His schedule is never too busy… His diagnosis is accurate… His treatment is gentle… His results are wonderful! You couldn’t be in better hands! –Author Unknown

Death: Why It Is Not A Solution For The Woes Of Living

Literature, , ,

by David E. Moss

It is a paradox of human wisdom that men seek to delay death as long as possible and at the same time offer death as a solution to the suffering members of their race. Mankind frantically seeks the solution to death so that it may escape the horrible end to existence. Yet by some strange twist of thought, it is able to translate death into a solution for the woes of living.

The Bible says that death is a penalty. It was not part of God’s plan. In fact, it was contrary to the nature and innocence of the first man and woman; but because of their defiance of God’s directive, the whole race lost the seal of life and was doomed to die.

In one of his foolish imaginations, man has reversed the stigma of death by claiming we have a “right” to die: as though death were a panacea instead of poison.

The flaw in human reasoning concerning death stems from man’s inability to observe both sides of the experience — the before side and the after side. All we really know about it is what we see on the before side. Concerning the after side, we are able to observe the lifelessness and decay of the body, but everything else remains a mystery.

The Quality of Life

At the heart of the issue is the controversy between the “quality of life” and the “sanctity of life.” According to the Bible, life has sanctity. That is, it is a gift and not a happenstance. It is sacred and inviolable. It has purpose and value. Simply to possess life is to be rich. The alternative view, however, suggests that possessing life is not worth the effort if the life one possesses does not offer the desired amount of pleasure and satisfaction. In other words, the gift of life is not enough, it must also be of sufficient quality to be of any value.

Indeed, life has the potential of being immensely difficult. Disease and deformity, accidents and confrontations, war and calamities of nature cause pain and suffering that can catapult us beyond our capacity to cope. In these conditions we feel anything but wealthy; and we can be easily convinced that something other than living would be of more value.

The controversy surrounding the concept of the “quality of life” has given birth to the concept of the “right to die.” If it is judged that one’s quality of life has disintegrated, then dying is viewed as having more value than continuing to live without quality. People like Jack Kevorkian actively campaign to legitimize the “right to die.” He has indubitably merged the acts of euthanasia and suicide into what is termed “assisted suicide.” While euthanasia involves one person ending the life of another, suicide involves a person ending his own life. Assisted suicide combines these together as one person provides the means for another person to end his own life. Mr. Kevorkian and his sympathizers argue that euthanasia and assisted suicide ought to be a legal part of medical practice because ending a life that has lost its quality is a merciful and compassionate “medical” procedure.

But can anyone’s life really deteriorate to such a low level that it loses its sanctity? Furthermore, if death ever becomes desirable over living, who has the right to decide when the moment of death should occur?

The Deficient Life of the Unregenerate

Those who are unsaved have an excuse for being so confused about life and death issues. Though living human beings, they are already dead in their trespasses and sins (Ephesians 2:1). Death is their state of being. Consequently, for people in this condition, physical death is only a natural phenomenon that terminates a purely visceral existence.

An unregenerate lifestyle is based upon pleasure, comfort, satisfaction and a sense of accomplishment. When none of these can be derived from one’s experience, life becomes worthless.

Death is viewed as an anesthesia that numbs the senses and obliterates consciousness. It is believed that a suffering, tortured human being can only find comfort by sealing himself in an immortalized comatose state called death — the ultimate drug that offers a permanent escape.

The Error of Man’s Imagination

There is a significant flaw in this thinking. That is, one who wishes to flee life and seeks to do so by dying, is only looking on one side of death. Death has two sides. On this side of death, we live in a conscious state in the environment called earth. On the other side of death…?

Here is the tricky part of the issue. Man imagines what it is like after he dies. He imagines that it is either a state of annihilation in which nothing matters anymore, or it is a state of tranquility in which everyone lives in a universal nirvana.

The truth must come from a genuine source of authority on the subject — God. He says that saved people do indeed awaken in His presence when they pass through the door of death (II Corinthians 5:6-8). However, unsaved people are far from any resolution to their problems as they plunge irreversibly into the pit of Hell (Luke 16:22-23).

For the unregenerate, death is a most unfortunate experience. Their choice does not relieve them from suffering but adds to it. As the rich man who awoke in hell, they find themselves in torments, with a hot dry tongue, and their suffering grievously aggravated by flames all about them (Luke 16:23-24). Added to this is the mental torture they will endure for eternity while they realize that choosing to die actually cut off forever their opportunity to choose to live through Jesus Christ.

But What About the Christian?

This raises a serious question for Christians. If a Christian’s salvation is secure, wouldn’t death be a desirable option for believers who are suffering in this world?

The initial answer to this question is “yes”; but the answer must be qualified with an explanation and illustrated with Scriptural examples. The qualification is this: a Christian may justifiably desire death, which would place him in the presence of God; but a believer must acknowledge that the timing of death is a choice that belongs only to God.

  1. Job as an example.

    To say that Job suffered is an understatement. There was absolutely no pleasure or comfort in his experience. Nothing he did satisfied his terrible longing for relief. In all that was taken from him, he must have felt an overwhelming sense of loss and failure. There was no quality whatsoever to Job’s existence. In the midst of this he was encouraged by his wife to commit suicide (Job 2:9).

    In fact, Job did desire to die (Job 3:11-21). Yet he acknowledged that the timing of his death was in the hands of God (Job 6:8-9) and consequently he had no right to choose death. He unequivocally rejected his wife’s suggestion. For Job, desire and choice were two totally distinct and incompatible concepts.

  2. Paul as an example.

    To the Philippians, Paul expressed a strong desire to be out of this life and into the presence of God (Philippians 1:21-23). Nevertheless, he recognized that there was a viable reason for remaining active on earth. As long as God had something for him to do here, he would willingly remain. Only by the choice and hand of God would he depart from this life (II Timothy 4:6-7).

The Ramifications of a Christian’s Death

When an unbeliever dies, the greatest grief comes to himself. He enters into eternal damnation from which he will never escape. Even though people remaining on earth miss the departed person, their grief is nothing compared to that of one who awakens in Hell.

When a Christian dies, by whatever means, the greatest grief comes to those who are left behind. If the means of death is by disease, old age, accident or some fatal wound inflicted by an external source, the remaining loved ones grieve the loss of fellowship for one they held dear. Yet they understand that the victim is much better in the presence of God than they ever could be on earth.

If a believer commits suicide, he causes a debilitating grief within people acquainted with the departed individual. A person who claims Christ as Savior has declared that the Lord Jesus has the power to overcome an eternal problem in his life — sin. If that same person then commits suicide, he is declaring that Christ is not powerful enough to solve his temporal problems. These two things are contradictory. For any of the deceased’s acquaintances who may be considering Christ as a solution, the suicide of a Christian will be greatly discouraging. There is the potential that they will reason something like this: “If Christ could not help my friend solve the problems of his earthly life, how will he ever help me in eternity?” A Christian’s suicide could actually be the factor which discourages another person from trusting Christ for salvation.

A Christian who commits suicide is testifying that the Bible is not true. He is declaring that God’s grace is not sufficient; God is not always a very present help in time of trouble; God may give me more than I can bear without a way to escape; I cannot do all things through Christ who strengthens me. Etc., etc. [In fact, the opposite is true. II Corinthians 12:9; I Corinthians 10:13; Philippians 4:13]

A Christian who desires to commit suicide is declaring that he knows more than God. He knows there is no possible solution to his anxieties. He knows the best time to die. [In fact, the opposite is true. “For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, saith the LORD. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts” (Isaiah 55:8-9).]

A Christian who chooses suicide over life on earth is rejecting the sovereignty of Almighty God. He believes that God cannot possibly be in control if things are so wrong. This comes from the false doctrine that God can give me joy only from good things. [In fact, the opposite is true. “They that sow in tears shall reap in joy” (Psalm 126:5). “Count it all joy when ye fall into divers temptation; knowing this, that the trying of you faith worketh patience” (James 1:2-3).]

There is irony in all of this. A Christian by committing suicide declares that God cannot help him. Yet in dying he wants to go to God. What does he expect God to do in heaven that he cannot do here?

Conclusion

Our original parents were warned by God that they would surely die in the day they ate of the forbidden fruit. They may not have known precisely what death was, but they should have known it was undesirable. Nevertheless, they chose to die. In a gracious gesture, God provided a solution. When they plunged into death through sin, God’s grace made it a reversible condition.

The Bible teaches us that faith in Jesus Christ and his redemptive work provides a person with an escape from the condemnation of spiritual and physical death (I Corinthians 15). That escape, however, is only available as long as a person is living on the earth.

To Mr. Kevorkian and the members of our society who believe that living human beings have a right to die:

You believe that there is no credible evidence that life survives the death of the body. As a result you sincerely believe that in assisting people to die “with dignity” you are actually improving their state of being. Yet it can as easily be claimed that there is no credible evidence that life does not survive the death of the body. But one thing is certain about death — it is irreversible.

In living there is always hope. In dying, destiny is sealed. You may not believe in God, but no human being has the right to play God. Assisting a person to commit suicide is murder because it irreversibly seals the eternal destiny of the dead person. Whether they awaken or sleep, Mr. Kevorkian, you may not know. But the dying person finds out — too late to change his mind.

To the Christian who is contemplating this chilling choice to die:

God’s word is true. Jesus suffered and died for all your pain and affliction. God’s solution is available to you. It only requires a simple, childlike faith. The same Christ who calmed the storm for the disciples on the Sea of Galilee can calm the storm in your life. Remember that Job’s suffering ended and the Apostle Paul finished his course. Before you choose to die, believe that God is able.

Coping In The Middle Of A Trial

Literature,

by David E. Moss

A few years ago, a very serious auto accident occurred on Route 78 between Allentown and Harrisburg. It just happened that the same day, I was returning to York from a Bible Conference in Connecticut. I had no way of knowing that such an accident had occurred and obstructed my path. Following my normal route, I traveled south on 209 through the Poconos, then down 33 to 22 west. A few miles past the point where 22 and 78 converge, I came to a huge traffic back up caused by the accident. Traffic remained at a stand still for a considerable period of time. I could not go forward. I could not turn around and go back because I was on a limited access highway. I did not want to be stuck in this traffic jam, but there was nothing I could do about it. I was in the middle of it and that was it.

Sometimes in life we find ourselves in the middle of a trial. We are not sure how we got into the situation. We have no idea how or when it will end. We are simply in the midst of circumstances that are unwelcome, unpleasant, and uncertain. They were not necessarily set in motion because of anything we had done wrong. Nevertheless, there we are. How do we cope in the middle of an ongoing trial?

Genesis Chapter 43 suggests some principles which are appropriate to this scenario. This chapter is in the middle of the story concerning Joseph in Egypt, the great famine, and Joseph’s ten brothers attempting to buy food for survival. Chapter 43 is incomplete alone. It begins as a continuation of events in preceding chapters. It ends without a conclusion to the events that occur within it. It may seem puzzling why the chapter division was made in this place, yet it provides an excellent illustration of our subject. On the brothers’ second visit to Egypt to buy food, they found themselves in the middle of some circumstances that were very confusing. They had no idea how they got where they were. They were just simple shepherds from Canaan brought into the palace of this strange Egyptian ruler. They had no idea what the conclusion of this trial was going to be, though they could imagine the worst. The observations we can make from this chapter will give us some hints about coping in the middle of a trial.

  1. Do What Needs To Be Done.

    Chapter 42 records the brothers’ first trip to Egypt. The famine predicted by Pharaoh’s dreams became such a harsh reality that even in Canaan, survival became dependent upon the food available in Egypt. During that first visit, the disguised Joseph accused his brothers of being spies, required them to bring their youngest brother, Benjamin, along with them if they came again to buy food, and imprisoned Simeon as insurance.

    As Chapter 43 opens, the food purchased on that first trip was running low and the famine was continuing in full force. Jacob told his sons to go back to Egypt to buy more food (verses 1-2).

    Judah explained to his father that Benjamin must go along on a return trip. It was clear to them that the man in Egypt would not sell them any more food if their youngest brother did not accompany them. Without Benjamin, there was no sense in making a trip to Egypt (verses 3-5).

    Jacob’s reaction does not fit the discussion. He questioned his sons’ past judgement in telling the man in Egypt that they had a younger brother. Wherefore dealt ye so ill with me, he said, as to tell the man whether ye had yet a brother? (Verse 6). It is often the case that people try to cope with present trials by casting “why did you do that” accusations against things that people have already done. Such questions might be helpful in learning what not to do in future situations, but for the present, what was done was done and casting blame was not going to change what was.

    That day on route 78, the traffic had come to a complete stop. People had turned off their engines and were getting out of their cars to walk around and share their confusion about what was going on. I could have wondered how close to home I would have been if only I had gotten off the highway earlier and taken a different route home. But no matter how frustrated I would have allowed myself to become, such wonderings would never change the fact that I was sitting still in the middle of backed up traffic.

    The brothers explained to their father why it was necessary for them to tell about their younger brother. But the bottom line was that Jacob needed to accept the reality of things as they were and focus on what had to be done as a result (verse 7).

    Judah then insisted that their survival depended upon Benjamin accompanying them to Egypt. He made himself surety for Benjamin’s safety and accepted full responsibility for his welfare. But time was wasting away as their food supplies were running low, and the severity of the famine required no more delays if they were going to survive. (verses 8-10).

    Jacob finally resigned himself to what must be done. He said to his sons, If is must be so now, do this… (verse 11).

  2. Accept The Inevitable, Or At Least The Possibility Of An Unwanted Outcome.

    Jacob proceeded to give his sons instructions for their second trip to Egypt. His words show that he had actually thought the whole thing through. He knew all along what had to be done; it was just a matter of accepting the inevitable. This is hard to do, but necessary for all of us at times.

    As I sat in that stalled traffic on route 78, I could have huffed and puffed and fumed about sitting still in the middle of a highway, about being delayed in getting home, and about getting hungry while supper time passed by without access to food, but my rantings would not have changed anything. I had to accept my circumstances as they were and resign myself to the delay.

    Jacob told his sons what they should take with them to Egypt. He said they should take some presents to the man in Egypt, take double money, enough to pay for this time and for the last time when their money was returned in their sacks, and take their brother Benjamin (verses 11-13). He then stated his resignation to what he thought would be the inevitable outcome of this tragedy. If I be bereaved of my children, I am bereaved (verse 14).

    It is interesting that God often waits for us to accept the worst as a possibility before he brings a positive solution into our lives. Had he not resigned himself to what had to be done and accepted the potential consequences, Jacob might have held onto Benjamin for a short time, but ended up losing his whole family to the famine. By accepting things as they were, doing what needed to be done, and resigning himself to an unwanted outcome if that was what had to be, Jacob would not only have Benjamin restored to him, but Joseph as well.

    When my sister graduated from nursing school, she faced adult life as a single woman. This was not what she wanted, but there were no prospective husbands in sight. A career opportunity came her way and she struggled with what to do. Should she pursue this opportunity and commit herself to being single? Could she resign herself to never getting married? It was a difficult thing to do because it seemed so contrary to the desire of her heart, yet she gave herself to the Lord for His will in her life, and if that meant being single, she was willing to accept it. Very soon after she sincerely resigned herself to the possibility of never getting married, she received a phone call from a single young man who wondered if she would be willing to go out with him. You guessed it. She ended up marrying this man — who also happened to be a pastor of a church. Not only did she get to marry, but she also was able to serve the Lord with her husband. Her willingness to do without the desire of her heart made God’s graciousness to her that much sweeter.

  3. Endure Confusion.

    The brothers traveled to Egypt and presented themselves to the disguised Joseph to buy food. Joseph instructed his steward to take these eleven men to his personal residence where he intended to dine with them for the noon meal (verses 15-17).

    This caused a great deal of apprehension among the brothers. They were afraid that the money they carried back with them in their sacks after the first trip was going to cause them serious problems and they let their imagination run wild. They feared that their doom was sealed and they were all destined to become slaves (verse 18). All through the trials of the first trip and this second one, the brothers were convinced that their difficulties were directly related to what they had done to Joseph. On the first trip when they were accused of being spies and faced the prospect of imprisonment, they lamented concerning the punishment which was catching up with them. They said, We are verily guilty concerning our brother, in that we saw the anguish of his soul when he besought us, and we would not hear: therefore is this distress come upon us (Genesis 42:21). So it is no surprise on this second trip that they foresaw themselves as slaves in a just retribution for their evil deeds.

    This is a fault many of us make in the middle of trials when we cannot see when or how they will be resolved. We let our imagination run wild and we get ourselves unnecessarily worked up about things that probably will never happen. Have you ever had the experience of anticipating tense conversations? You expect to be talking to someone with whom you have a conflict or disagreement. Your mind imagines what the other person will say, and then imagines what you will say in response. You work your way through whole conversations like this and at the end, if your thoughts do not satisfy the dread of your soul, your mind starts all over again and imagines an even more stressful conversation. It is a silly exercise, but our imaginations seem to enjoy working overtime suggesting all the really bad things that can possibly happen. This is different from the idea of accepting the inevitable or the possibility of an unwanted outcome. Acceptance brings peace which is a good thing. An unchecked imagination takes away peace which is not a good thing.

    The brothers tried to explain to Joseph’s steward that they were not thieves and could not explain why their money was in their sacks when they arrived home. They assured him that they had brought that money with them this time and were prepared to pay in full for all the food they had received (verses 19-22).

    This is where their confusion begins to take an interesting turn. Joseph’s steward said that the money from their previous trip was a nonissue and they should not concern themselves about it. He said, Peace be to you, fear not: your God, and the God of your father, hath given you treasure in your sacks: I had your money (verse 23). He then invites the men to refresh themselves and prepare for lunch (verses 24-25).

    When Joseph came home to eat, the brothers offered their presents to him and bowed before him. He continued his charade and politely inquired about their father (verses 26-28). Then when he came face to face with his beloved brother Benjamin, he broke down and had to excuse himself to regain his composure (verses 29-31). When he returned, he ordered lunch to be served. He had already designated the seats for each of his brothers who were placed at their table in the order of their birth. The brothers were totally confused about how this man in Egypt could know this. Then Benjamin was given five times as much food as all the others. They all had a wonderful time. Scripture says they were merry with Joseph (verses 31-34).

    This is where the chapter ends. The chapter divisions were not included when Scripture was originally written. They were added much later, apparently during the 13th Century A.D. But over the years I have developed a great respect for the person or persons who carefully decided where to make the chapters begin and end. Some object to many of these divisions, claiming that connected verses were unnecessarily separated by them. But I have tried to reason with the person who made these division and figure out why they put them where they are. I have always been able to find some reasonable explanation which helps in understanding the intent of God’s Word.

    We might wonder why Genesis Chapter 43 ends in the middle of the second trip to Egypt, leaving the brothers enjoying a wonderful meal in the midst of some very confusing circumstances. But dwelling in the middle of trials is a typical experience of human beings. And in the middle of such circumstances there is often considerable confusion, both about what is actually happening and about what is going to come out of it. It is well for us in the middle of trials to pause for a moment and put our experience into perspective.

    The brothers had no idea why things were happening the way they were. They went from fear and trepidation about all of them becoming slaves to sitting in a palace and enjoying a wonderful meal. They had no idea what was going to happen when the meal was over. Would they be allowed to purchase food and return home in safety, or would some other strange thing happen to cause fear to return to their hearts?

    We need to recognize that it is okay for us to be confused. I am not sure the brothers were thinking this way, but their predicament allows us to do so. Even though the brothers did not understand what was happening and did not know what was coming next, Someone did. God did. And if He knows what is happening, then He has everything under control. Who ever said we have to understand everything in life. As long as God understands, isn’t that sufficient?

    In that traffic jam I was in, it would have been easy to imagine some terrible things about what was up ahead, or how long it was going to take to get home. But there were people at the scene of the accident where the traffic back up started who knew all about the situation and were taking care of it. I could not see that. But there was absolutely nothing I could do where I was but trust that someone was up ahead taking care of things and resolving whatever the problem was.

    In the middle of our trials, when we cannot understand why we have to be where we are, when we are totally confused about how such things could happen to us, and when we are even more confused about how they are ever going to be resolved, we can successfully endure our confusion by pausing to remember that God knows everything and He is already walking ahead of us taking care of things for us.

Conclusion

Proverbs 3:5-6 – Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.

Acknowledging God in all our ways is one of the basic exercises of life every believer needs to learn. To acknowledge God means that we turn our thoughts to Him and tell Him we know He is present in our lives and able to help us in our present circumstances. It is easy to be so distracted by the stress of difficult events that we forget about God for a moment and fail to acknowledge Him. In the middle of trials, we often fret, and worry, and imagine all kinds of terrible things, and get frustrated, and panic, and add to our stress by our own despair. But if in the middle of trials we will pause long enough to acknowledge God, our trial-in-progress will take on a whole different perspective.

After acknowledging God, then we must wait for him to act. This is not easy because God usually works on an entirely different timetable than we do. When we are in the middle of a trial, we want it to be over as soon as possible. But God may have some perfectly divine reasons why the trial should be extended for a considerable period of time. We must trust that God knows what He is doing and wait for Him to act when He decides it is time to do so. There are many verses of Scripture that admonish us to wait on the Lord.

Psalm 123:2 – …so our eyes wait upon the LORD our God, until that he have mercy upon us.

Psalm 37:7 – Rest in the LORD, and wait patiently for him…

Isaiah 30:18 – And therefore will the LORD wait, that he may be gracious unto you, and therefore will he be exalted, that he may have mercy upon you: for the LORD is a God of judgment: blessed are all they that wait for him.

As I sat still in the middle of a highway, it helped me to think that someone was up ahead at the source of the problem, taking care of the circumstances that had created an obstacle to my path. The whole matter was completely out of my hands. There was not one thing I could do myself to clear up the traffic jam. But someone was taking care of the matter. So I waited. Eventually we started to move. At first it was very slow, and sometimes we had to stop again for a while. In all, it took two and one half hours to go five miles. And then it was over and I was on my way home.

We will be able to cope in the middle of trials if we stop to realize that God is dealing with the source of the problem. Deuteronomy 31:8 says, And the LORD, he it is that doth go before thee; he will be with thee, he will not fail thee, neither forsake thee: fear not, neither be dismayed. He goes before us. He is always ahead of us, directing our paths, removing our obstacles, preparing the help we are going to need as we move through the circumstances of our lives.

Are there some trying circumstances in progress right now in your life? Take a deep breath. Turn your heart to God and acknowledge Him. Do what needs to be done. Accept the inevitable, or at least the possibility of an unwanted outcome. Tell yourself it is okay to be confused because God is not confused about what is going on and He has everything under control. And then wait. Wait for as long as it takes for God to act to resolve the situation. And while you wait, trust that God knows exactly what He is doing. If you follow this plan, you will be amazed at how reduced your stress level will be.